Eric Stevenson
Inweekly, 9/14/2006
What is your greatest fear?
The paparazzi.
What is the trait you must deplore?
Smoking.
Which person do you most admire?
John Adams. Despite being an ardent patriot, he was given the unenviable task of representing the British troops involved in the Boston Massacre. Despite his loyalties, he tried the cases and got not guilty verdicts. In his later years, he said that was his greatest moment, greater than all his other accomplishments.
What is your greatest extravagance?
Gold Bond Medicated Powder in the green bottle.
What is your favorite journey?
“Journey to Ixtlan” by Carlos Castaneda.
What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
Patience.
Which words or phrase do you most overuse?
Goddammit.
When and where are you most comfortable?
9 p.m. lying on the couch reading.
Which talent would you most like to have?
Invisibility.
What is your current state of mind?
I’m looking California, but feeling Minnesota.
What do you consider your greatest failure?
I never completed all the levels on Super Mario Brothers.
What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Filling out questionnaires for weekly newspapers. I guess it could be worse, I could be filling it out for the PNJ.
What is your most striking characteristic?
Bow tie.
What is the quality you most like in other people?
Wit.
What do you most dislike?
Mayonnaise.
If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?
The ones who aren’t here would be here.
What have you learned in life?
White Castle fries only come in one size.
How would you like to die?
This is an awful question. It’s not really one I can be a smartass about. I guess, I’d like to die quickly and quietly.
What is your motto?
It takes a lot to laugh, it takes a train to cry.